Resolutions Revisited: How to Create and Adjust Realistic Resolutions

Every January, many people set New Year’s resolutions with genuine hope. Yet within weeks, those same resolutions are often abandoned, followed by frustration, guilt, or self-criticism. This pattern leads many to believe they “lack discipline” or “just aren’t consistent”.

In reality, most resolutions fail not because people are incapable of change, but because the goals themselves are unrealistic, rigid, or driven by pressure rather than self-understanding.

Revisiting how we approach resolutions can make change more sustainable — and far less punishing.

Why Most Resolutions Don’t Stick

Many resolutions are created in moments of motivation, not reflection. They tend to be broad (“get healthier”, “save more money”), absolute (“never skip workouts”), or based on comparison (“I should be doing more”).

These types of goals leave little room for real life. When stress, illness, or unexpected events arise, people interpret deviation as failure rather than feedback.

Another common issue is timing. January is often treated as a universal starting line, but emotionally, not everyone is ready for change at the same time. Capacity matters.

Reframing Resolutions as Experiments

One of the most helpful shifts is to see resolutions as experiments, not promises.

An experiment allows curiosity:

• Does this fit my life right now?

• Is this supporting me or draining me?

• What’s actually getting in the way?

  
  

This approach removes the all-or-nothing mindset and replaces it with learning.

When and How to Reassess Your Goals

Goals should be reviewed regularly, not only when they fail.

A helpful guideline:

• 2–4 weeks: Is this realistic alongside my current responsibilities?

• 6–8 weeks: Does this goal still feel meaningful, or is it driven by guilt?

• Around 3 months: Is this something I want to continue, adjust, or pause?

Adjusting a goal is not giving up. It’s responding to real information rather than forcing yourself through resistance.

Flexibility Is a Strength, Not a Weakness

Many people equate flexibility with lack of commitment. In reality, flexibility allows goals to survive changing circumstances.

A rigid goal often breaks under pressure. A flexible one adapts.

For example:

• Reducing frequency rather than stopping completely

• Changing the form of a habit while keeping the intention

• Pausing without abandoning the value behind the goal

Sustainable change is rarely linear.

Closing Thoughts

Resolutions don’t fail because people are weak. They fail because they’re often created without space for humanity.

Goals work best when they can change as you do.